Self-Management is a powerful tool to have in your toolbox. This provides the ability to respond appropriately to emotionally driven situations instead of reacting. Self-Management includes factors such as self-control, adaptability, achievement, and a positive outlook.
When talking about emotional intelligence, it is important to point out that we are all human, and that humans are emotional beings. I went through an emotional rough patch after earning my doctorate, which qualified me as a subject matter expert in emotional intelligence. I was in a constant state of reacting, usually in anger. I didn’t realize just how much I was in react mode until I went through NLP certification. I was swimming in a cesspool of my own emotional making.
“When I say manage emotions, I only mean the really distressing, incapacitating emotions. Feeling emotions is what makes life rich. You need your passions.”Daniel Goleman
Self-Management of emotions is not about suppressing the emotions. When we suppress our emotions, they are stored in our bodies. Research has already proven the impact that suppressing negative emotions has, such as anger. Suppressed anger doesn’t just disappear, it can transform into physical stress (i.e., heart attack), anxiety, and/or depression. It impacts one’s behavior and takes away the ability to tap into other emotions (i.e., happiness).
Self-control is the ability to effectively manage the disruptive emotions and impulses to stay composed and focused during those situations that trigger the emotions. There is a time and place for everything, and sometimes it is screaming into the woods afterwards (psst… that’s not a Bigfoot call in my area…).
The ability to manage emotional responses displays honesty and integrity and builds trust with people. You can fulfill obligations dependably and responsibly with a conscious effort of accountability. This then leads to a path of innovation and adaptability by being open to new ideas, approaches, and information.
Do you better understand the difference between responding and reacting? Being in control of yourself versus letting everything else control you.
What if you mastered self-management? What would change in your life? How would that affect your business decisions?
Schedule an appointment to learn more about how to implement emotional intelligence and self-management in your life and be the leader.
Next week I will move on to Social Awareness in emotional intelligence.